A BUS STOP IN HOUNSLOW
Brentford 2 West Ham 0
One of the following three statements is false: It’s the hope that kills you. Arsenal lose at home to Brighton and Manchester United surrender at Everton. A weary and tired West Ham United win handsomely at Brentford.
Only Bozo the Lying Clown PM might imagine he could convince his audience that the final statement of those three could stand a scintilla’s chance of being believed, though I held on tightly to scant hope as I sat down to watch West Ham’s latest adventure, in west London.
Fabianski, Coufal and the carless Lanzini return to Moyes’ starting XI this afternoon, and Cresswell is still around as Thursday’s red one match ban only applies to the Europa League competition. Keep an eye as this will be relevant later in the report.
It has been the joy of the last couple of seasons for any West Ham fan that they could look in the direction of any of the outfield ten for inspiration in any given fixture. This afternoon they are looking to the eleven players of the home side for an error so catastrophic that it leads to a goal.
Brentford seem sorted for e’s and whizz in the first exchanges as their Erikson-inspired one touch football threatens to blast the Hammers out of their top six orbit. Brentford having two strikers to West Ham’s one and a bit is a clear advantage, especially in the light of the bit and the one carrying around legs heavier than half a Frank Lampard.
Half an hour in, with Brentford passing well and West Ham looking tired, Kurt Zouma heads upfield after a neat one two opens up a little space for him in the midfield, but Christian Nørgaard, showing plenty of rearguard but not much Christian, crunches Zoum Zoum in from the side and, after some attention and a recurring ankle spasm, Zouma limps off, accompanied by Brentford fan cries of ‘That’s how your cat feels.’ Issa Diop comes on and does his best to help Hammers continue their collective limp to a half time whistle that is met with extreme relief.
The second half is just three minutes old when a short throw is flicked on past the prone Aaron Cresswell by Ivan Toney to set Brian Mbuemo into space in the area where he powers a shot past Fabianski with aplomb. It is such a simple goal that it exposes West Ham’s raw defensive calumny, and puts the Bees one up. Just a quarter of an hour later, their lead is doubled, when Mbuemo steers a far post cross into the path of Ivan Toney who heads home his twelfth goal of the season. If only West Ham had a striker who could hit the back of the net with such regularity. If only.
There are a couple of half chances in the last few minutes of the game, but most Hammers fans are currently spending these rare moments with their necks cricked in the direction of the dugout where Zouma continues to nurse his dodgy ankle. Hammers look shattered after a two day break, but three days from now they will again face an energy challenge, and this time for a game that reflects a final chance of silverware in what has still been an excellent season for them.
1 Lucasz Fabianski, 3 Aaron Cresswell, 5 Vladimir Soufal, 4 Kurt Zouma, 41 Declan Rice (c), 15 Craig Dawson, 28 Tomas Souček, 8 Pablo Fornals, 10 Manuel Lanzini, 9 Michail Antonio, 20 Jarrod Bowen
Substitutes: 23 Issa Diop, 22 Saïd Benrahma
